I sat in the hot tub tonight pondering my life and the lives of others. It is easier to look at the failings of others while being blinded to my own. Truly, there is a plank in my eye.
My mind wandered, as it always seems to do these days (wander, that is) to all the people and places and things and stuff that have wronged me in my life. How I hold on to the hurt and the pain of those times, events, places and people. How I let all of that infect me and darken how I view it all. Because they did such and such to me I have every right to feel about them the way I do.
I asked God, "Who do I need to forgive?". Before that thought even finished, one person and one organization in particular came to mind. It was like, "Lord, who do I....", and there it was. It is amazing how just their very names dredge up the hurt, the anger, the pain that these two have caused. And not just to me, but to others that I've cared about. And I sat there for a few moments feeling justified in my feelings towards them.
I then remembered that Jesus Christ was wronged (and continues to be wronged by me) more that I have ever been wronged or hurt by others. He gave his life in my place to satisfy the judgment of God that was rightfully placed on me. He forgave the ones who hurt him, caused him pain, and wronged him. He is my example of how far I need to go in order to forgive. I hear his voice from the Scriptures as he's being nailed to the cross, " Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." I hear Stephen, the first Christian martyr, echo the same words in Scripture as the religious leaders stone him to death for his testimony to them about Jesus Christ. In their examples my justification for holding on to my complete lack of forgiveness melts away. There is no room for anger, bitterness, hurt, etc., in the life of a Christian. How can I pray the Lord's Prayer, "Forgive us(me) our trespasses, as we(I) forgive those who trespass against us." Lets throw the religious veneer off and say it like it really is in my life: "Please forgive me the multitude of sins that I wallow in daily and commit against You, while I hold onto every scrap of wrongdoing others do to me, that I may justify my anger and bitterness towards them."
I found myself finally being willing to forgive these two, and others. "I forgive them what they did to me. Please help me to not go back on this." What gain is there in holding onto this? Surely this life is temporary, and Jesus Christ will deal with all wrongs committed. Do I really need to help Him in this? Can I REALLY do the right thing here? Can I REALLY be GOD? Better to leave judgment to Him, and Him alone.
Okay, I'm done. Now, I'm going to change directions here and add this nifty little video that has absolutely nothing to do with what I've just written here. It's a new kung fu movie starring Donnie Yen playing Ip Man, the Wing Chun Grandmaster who taught Bruce Lee. Enjoy!!!
